If you are a parent and haven't read 5 Spiritual Solutions to Everyday Parenting Challenges stop right now...follow this link....and buy this book. It has been amazing and has completely changed the way I think about my role as a parent and I've only gotten through the first 3 solutions.
When I read a book like this I like to take it a little bit at a time, work on one thing, then move to the next. If I read the whole book in one fell swoop it would have entered through my eyes and out my nose as I slept (nice visual huh) So I break it up into bits. The first solution was completely eye opening. The second solution is where I learned about Family Laws. The Family laws that you all seem to be so interested in since I keep hinting about them. The same family laws that have completely changed my family.
They Eyre's (the authors of the book) talk about how they set laws rather than "rules" in their family. Breaking a law sounds like a bigger deal than breaking a rule and I believe that to be very true. Each law comes with a consequence for breaking it...a very specific consequence. I have for a very long time been struggling with being the type of parent I want to be. I have this vision of what I should be but when it comes down to it, I suck!! So through much prayer and fasting this solution came to me through pure inspiration and this book. When I read the chapter on family laws I was hit with inspiration that we needed to do this. It took me a week or so and some very sincere prayer and thought.
We sat down to Family Home Evening on Monday almost 2 weeks ago with the intent to set up some family laws complete with consequences. The book suggested the kids help set the consequences so I just followed along. Now I could have just copied the laws they had but I knew that wouldn't work. We needed specific laws for what we struggle with as a family. These are what we came up with, the Conk Family Laws and Consequences
So what is the law that changed us totally? The first one and I totally believe that is is through divine inspiration that the idea came to me. So a little history here. I'm a yeller, yep sweet little quiet ol me is a yeller, I know you are falling off your chairs right now in disbelief! (totally kidding here people, I claim no ignorance of my volume problem, it's genetic, but I digress.) So this yelling problem has gotten so far out of hand that i just couldn't take it any more and I knew that the problem began with me and had to end with me. So these laws and consequences apply not only to my kids but us parents as well. In the last 2 weeks we have had to crack the scriptures open probably once or twice each member of the family but O MY GOSH the yelling is almost totally gone. The Repentance area is also a suggestion in the book and we have used it and it has really helped the conflict resolution between the kids. They are getting along so much better. If you want to know what the heck a repentance area is you really have to get the book!! The kids were a huge part setting the laws and consequences., and since they help set them they have been more likely to follow them.
So there you have it, The Conk Family Laws. (is it everything you ever hoped it would be??) My best advise about setting your own family laws is to pray about the things you need to work on as a family and the spirit will guide you on your journey to becoming the best parents for YOUR kids!!